In Light of Sexual Assault Awareness Month
TW: discussion concerning sexual assault
This subject has always been kind of a tricky one, hasn’t it? Many people tend to brush off this topic or attempt to swiftly change it to something more “comfortable” to speak about.
But just because it’s an uncomfortable one, doesn’t mean it’s unimportant, does it?
There’s nothing wrong with feeling awkward towards this, however I feel the need to point out that allowing this feeling to dictate your actions causing you to avoid the topic altogether isn’t good, either.
Even if you yourself haven’t experienced sexual assault, it’s not unlikely that somebody you know has.
Carrying a general understanding, awareness, and willingness to acknowledge and talk about it can help those around you who have experienced it feel more seen and understood by you.
And if you are one of those that have endured this trauma… I’m sorry. Me too. My heart goes out to you. It should never have happened, but it did.
But you know what?
We’re still here.
We’re still breathing. In fact, focus on your breath for a moment, why don’t you?
Notice the air flowing in through your nose, and out through your mouth. Feel your chest rise and fall with each breath. Repeat this a couple times or more. Beautiful how that can work, isn’t it?
You are a strong, capable human being. Yes, even on the days you struggle to get out of bed. Even during the times you have to fight back tears. Even whenever you may be fighting flashbacks.
You see, sexual assault is a vile act that leaves it’s victims with trauma. As a victim, you may experience the effects of this trauma for year’s, possibly even the rest of your life.
While I know this sounds heavy, trust when I say that the burden can most definitely be lightened.
As cliche as it may sound, time does help heal all wounds. It may not make them disappear completely — a scar may be left — but eventually it will heal. You will heal.
Talking about it helps as well. Which is why I stress the importance of being open to discussion towards this subject, as uncomfortable as it may be.
With me, the first time I talked about this was with my best friend Dara. You see, she had also undergone a similarly traumatic experience. It happened for the both of us during early childhood.
A sad, sickeningly common experience.
It wasn’t until our sophomore year of high school, years after the incidents without anyone else ever having known, that we shared this “secret” with each other.
We cried for hours as we spoke of the unspeakable that had been done to us, we shared every sick detail with each other the things we had been told to never tell a soul. And it was good for us. It was growth.
It was the start of our healing journeys, and along with it — a beautiful, long-lasting bond.
Since then we have both opened up about these parts of our stories with others. For her, it actually led to the speaking up of other victims of her abuser, and finally his imprisonment.
Not only can the openness to talk about sexual abuse lead to healing and growth, but as you can see, it just might also lead to justice.
So let’s talk about it more. Let’s not shrug off any hints towards it in conversation. Let’s not quickly look for an exit from the subject at every chance. Let’s not immediately dismiss any and all claims.
Let’s listen. Let’s empathize. Let’s support. Let’s love. Let’s help heal each other, along with ourselves — and with that, the whole world around us.
“We make the world safer when we speak up.” — Cleo Wade
